coasts.

i am all over the place right now. i feel like i'm balancing a stack of hardbound books on my head. the books are all different subjects, but about my life. and it feels like more and more of these books are being added to the stack with every move i make.

what the hell am i trying to say? there's too much. where would i start? not to mention that in the last eight weeks so much has happened i can't even seem to remember things before that.

anyway, it's a good thing the bro is in town this week. he's like one of those vehicles on the LAX tarmac that tow in the planes towards their gates (me being the plane in this instance).

. . . . . .

i miss barcelona. i love that town. it's like the almost-perfect l.a. well, the only thing that l.a. has on barce is the opportunity (as in jobs). but yes, almost perfect in the sense that the weather is great, the people are chill... beaches. spanish/english. culturally diverse. as it's in europe, health care isn't an issue. uh, and this is what does it for me: it's legal for barce residents to grow a max of two plants (you know the kind) in their homes for personal use.

let me get back into the health care thing really quick. it kind of kills me that americans are stuck on the whole health care issue. what's there to debate? i can walk into any public hospital in spain or france with no insurance and get the services i need. not to mention prescriptions are about a third of the price that they are in cali. without insurance. and the quality of the care i get is comparable to that here in the states. god i wish i could just show americans for myself. i hate talking about it. no words could really describe how teeth-grinding it is to sit and watch people debate over health care coverage in america. like it hurts.

or how are poor people republicans?

i wish i could fill a big old commercial airplane full of americans who have never left the country and fly them over to barcelona for seven days. they would receive a travel bag with a passport (do you know how many americans don't have u.s. passports? it's nuts!), a residency card valid for their seven-day stay, a metro or bicing card for transportation, and forty euros for groceries (because seriously, even less than forty euros per person could fill a fridge for seven days). their week-long itinerary would focus on understanding everyday life of your normal everyday euro resident. they would see for themselves.

. . . . . .

i'm doing a long-overdue spring cleaning of my parents' house. it is a trip. seeing old photos, reading old letters. i read a letter from one of my lovers in '99 talking about how he hopes to get a page from me soon. as in he had a pager. people still had pagers in '99? i guess so.

it's all too much. so overwhelming. but i'm home. i'll be here for a long time, i think. that is, until i can go back to barcelona and buy a little getaway there. best of both worlds. i can achieve that.

did you know that i love coastlines? i want to do a world tour of coastlines.







i'm back.