last week of january

time flies. i felt like it was just yesterday that i was in the south of france for the holidays. and now i'll be back there for an indefinite amount of time again come sunday. mackenzie and i are moving out of paris. which city we'll take on next, i'm not sure. we're on an unpractical wave, and it's probably best to enjoy the ride as long as we can afford to be on it.

paris is beautiful. but for the happy couple, it's more of a great place to visit than a city to call home. in any case, i will miss our little apartment, the charms of monmartre, and the everyday hustle that i've grown accustomed to the past couple of months.

it's all love.

follow your heart

my stay in paris is ending soon. that's what the old instinct tells me. funny though, i've been here since november and it's only now that i'm seeing all the lovely things about this place. isn't that how the story always goes?

yesterday, i was taking the metro to mack's office, and i had to get off a few stops earlier than my destination due to some accident. i had to take a bus off rue ordener in the 18th as an alternate route. and as i looked out the window i discovered a wall about 200-300 meters long on rue ordener that has some of the best graffiti i've seen here. ultra-colorful and positive creations against a cloud-filled and rainy backdrop. something for my muse.

up in the air

after searching for a new place to live in, we decided to stop looking last friday night. not because we found a place, though. where will we be after january 31st? i'm not sure, really. yet i'm surprisingly relaxed about it all.

anyway, mackenzie and i had a pretty fun weekend. after mack came back from skating bercy on saturday, we did a little window-shopping. checked out colette on the very chic-chic, boutique-lined rue st. honoré. it's like a minimalist urban outfitters. they carry a couple of creative labels (like bob k's crownfarmer!) and a few cool books, but it's nothing that i haven't seen before. coming from the states, and moreso l.a., maybe i'm spoiled with having been surrounded by so many outlets for new ideas. an observation that was made after leaving colette: if, say, the likes of dior, chanel and louis vuitton are the old school of creativity, and colette is the house of all that is considered new school, then paris seems to be a bit limited. or, having existed for so long, maybe paris is just more established.

on sunday, we visited the musee de la publicité next to the louvre. they had an amazing exhibition called psy[k]é/off the wall: affiches de san francisco 1966-1969. they displayed some of the most beautiful designs i'd seen from that time period. we also sat in on a couple of amazing films, like the doors in europe in 1968 and jimi hendrix playing live at rainbow bridge in maui. mack and i hung out there for a few hours. it was a rejuvination session for our creative souls.

bush wants to loot our loot!

i'll let moveon.org do the talking because they do know the real deal on this issue. this is important! and in any case, if it's going to take $100 million in pr and advertising for bush to convince americans that privatization is good for social security, then you know something's wrong. that's if you didn't already know that everything bush is wrong in the first place. jesus christ.
. . .
so it's back to cold-as-usual paris today, a.k.a. back to wearing my long johns.

there are these two french dudes visiting the office today from california (they work at the parent company that owns pony, kenneth cole, etc.). when the boss introduced them to mackenzie and me, he said, "this is mackenzie; he moved here from los angeles with his girlfriend jane who he had to marry so she could stay in the country." and then the two frenchies were like, "you were in l.a. and you moved to paris?" to which the boss interrupted, "yeah, they fucked up." huh. okay, i was about to call them assholes. but eh, they're just some square motherfuckers who nut over numbers and dollar signs.

ironically, mack and i have been scheming on taking off from the great city of lights for some time now.
. . .
"Tigger is all right really," said Piglet lazily.
"Of course he is," said Christopher Robin.
"Everybody is really," said Pooh. "That's what I think," said Pooh.
"But I don't suppose I'm right," he said.
"Of course you are," said Christopher Robin
~ from the tao of pooh

le premier jour des soldes!

hi, my name is jane, and i love to shop. but i'm picky and am never sold on something without having done my research. i never buy anything regularly-priced, and even if i get pieces at wholesale prices, i remain skeptical until i know in my heart that yes, my hard-earned cash is worth handing over to any one label. oh, and i've always got my iPod playing loudly in my ears as to not be deceived by any clothing that tries to scream my name. keeping this in mind, i'm bracing myself for the start of a 6-week sale happening in every boutique and department store in France.

one of France's treasures, annual sales, are only permitted to occur twice a year: winter and the end of summer. this year, the country-wide winter sale goes from january 12 to the end of february. and from what i've seen so far on my way to work this morning, there are lots of goodies to choose from! though it will be interesting to peruse racks of clothing and shoes in tiny aisles with more women than anyone wants to be around wearing big, poofy winter coats... we'll see how composed and graceful the parisiennes remain during a sale!

in other news, i received an email from langue onze, the non-profit institution i'm to take my french classes at in february. they're not sure if they can admit me because they need more people to register in the advanced class they determined i should be in after a short french writing test i took. advanced?!? if i'm so advanced, why can't i carry a conversation with anyone out here!!! putain...

hot sake

mmm... had some decent sushi last night for my big night on the town with mackenzie. it's somewhat close to our favorite sushi spot on santa monica blvd, none other than terried sake house. eh, actually, it's not close... more like, familiar to what i dig. and, it's better than the "mexican" restaurant we went to last friday night called la perla. first of all, a margarita in a small cocktail glass costs about 10 euros. a pitcher of it, fucking 56 euros. and the food, when i asked mack how his enchiladas were he said, "it's like an okay quesadilla." that pretty much says it all. needless to say, we miss chilling on the westside, eating mexican food, smoking our fill of fairy treats... blahblahblah.

one thing that's not so bad is that the weather in cali seems comparable to that of paris lately. no, no, i'm not hating. it's usually freezing in paris during the winter. but since the new year it's been in the mid 50s, and having adapted to being in much, much colder weather, (knock on wood) this is warm for paris. i'm just stoked that i can take a break from wearing my thick, unattractive thermals under my clothes that i've been sporting since november.

oh buddy, and then there's the apartment drama. wishy-washy man still hadn't made our keys to the apartment, so we decided that we'd just stay there til february and then find a new place. apparently this made w-w man upset, and for once, he was confident in proclaiming, "you'll have a hard time making friends in paris" because we're backing out on our agreement. well, jesus christ, i didn't even know that the man had even agreed to anything because he's always switching shit up. so, screw you and good riddance. right? then why did homie call back half an hour later to lower the rent even more? screw you and good riddance.
. . .

my sister left a message on my portable super early this morning at about 3:30am to say happy birthday. she put quirina on the phone, and i guess quirina didn't understand that she was leaving me a voicemail. i think she was waiting for me to say something back after her message because i could just hear her breathing. and then my sister took the phone back, and as she did, i could hear little q in the background say, "but she's not talking to me." it was just so cute that it broke my heart into little pieces.

they're traveling to hong kong for a couple of weeks. i can just picture the little girl tripping out on being there. hahaha, that reminds me of when mackenzie came back from a zoo york tour in hong kong, he brought back so many dvds, snacks and quality louis vuitton knock-offs. i'm sure my sister will have fun on this trip.

out with the old...

in 2004 i borrowed various digital cameras (thank you carlyle, oliver, & inger) and got tons of mileage out of mackenzie's scanner. but towards the end of the year, i had no more cameras to borrow, and the old scanner's tucked away in a box. i got a camera phone from inger and charles for christmas, and before i start posting pics that will be derived from my new phone, here are some photos i found today while cleaning up my mac files. enjoy!

mr. castellini graces the armacost compound, originally uploaded by mjane.

toto's regimen, originally uploaded by mjane.

some of the boys at SOLA, originally uploaded by mjane.

mikey took this minutes before i passed out right in front of GR, originally uploaded by mjane.

bob k's last day in l.a., originally uploaded by mjane.

two cutie pies: ollie & lola, originally uploaded by mjane.

yes, yes, we're cutting the cake, originally uploaded by mjane.

*mute* pt.ii

so i'm looking through the book of french class descriptions and schedules that the mayor's office offers for "non-francophones." but i'm not really clear exactly which class is right for me because the goddamn thing is written in french. is that ironic? or am i just a dummie? enter: frustration.

i get the gist of what the classes offer, and more generally, what people say in french. but sometimes not knowing one word here and there could lead me into making wrong decisions or understanding the complete opposite of what i'm being told. thus, frustration. not really because i'm worried about not completely understanding french, but because i have a feeling that my french-speaking partner gets irritated when i ask him for help.

anyway, we're moving into a bigger studio next week. but fuck, just like i vibed from the guy who's renting it to us, he's totally wishy-washy and seemingly shady because as soon as we move in we most likely will have to find another fucking place to live in. he's thinking of giving up the place at the end of february. so we're not guaranteed our stay if the new landlord already has someone else in mind for it or if they decide to hike up the rent. long story short, i should've been more "emotional" about being sure that homie's vibe was bad because, apparently, when i say things calmly and rationally, i'm not taken seriously.

go figure.
language barriers. stereotypes. handicaps. appearances...
communication
b
r
e
k
d
o
w
n.

*mute*

am going through another writer's block. this always seems to happen when i need to, you know, actually say something. of course that would be the case. it always seems to be. people say that doing a stream-of-consciousness method to writing is the best way to get things out. so let's try.

mackenzie and i have to leave our cute tiny apartment by january 14. i think we may already have another place - a bigger studio in le marais for a very good deal, but the landlord is a bit wishy-washy and his vibe doesn't mesh well with my no-bullshit way for getting by out here. it's either a sure thing or a sure nothing. maybe's are a luxury for me these days, and since i moved out here i haven't been able to afford one yet.

and then there's the issue with my brain and teaching it to think and speak in french. i think it already is thinking in french, though, because i've become a little more blasé. and that's probably because i don't say or stare much. ha, but maybe i don't say or stare much because i'm intimidated by people speaking french to me if i make eye contact with them! as for speaking french, it's not enough that most people say it usually takes a good year or two to really get into it. i need to speak it perfectly now! and that's probably the reason why my poor brain can't seem to get it to flow. too busy thinking of how it could come out perfectly instead of just spitting it out. i'm going to be taking french classes for two weeks starting the last week of february, but it seems so far away from now. so far away... no worries, though. the mayor's office offers very cheap, if not free, french classes for foreigners in order to help us assimilate more smoothly into living here. in any case, being deficient in the language is definitely trying my confidence. and that's the most challenging element of this whole experience thus far.

there are times when i'm convinced that i don't know myself any more. as if i've forgotten how to be me. i know it's impossible for me to lose who i think jane is. but it's almost painful for me to communicate myself without saying so much... or having mackenzie be my communicator, for that matter. i'm realizing, though, that maybe i've just depended too much on words to speak for me. i probably talk too much, anyway! and besides, i should take advantage of being the student during this transition instead of trying to already know. i always imagined that one of the best occupations to have is being a student. and so now i am.

puff puff pass, motherfucker

got back into paris sunday morning. woke up at 4am, got on the plane at 6:30am, and after a bus-to-metro ride home, i cooked up some bacon (canadian), eggs and rice with ketchup. so good! then, mack and i checked out a prospective studio to live in down in the 4th. we'll see how that situation turns out...

oh, and then i finally got to nap for a little while before we met up with toto to see redman perform at elysee monmartre that night. it was cool not only because elysee monmartre is only two blocks down from our apartment, but it was such a great way to end the new year weekend. and for my first show in paris, redman was pretty sick. plus, the vibe the crowd gave off was definitely amazing: so positive, so into redman, and ultra-chill. redman had a band and his dj. dj kool was there too, did his let me clear my throat joint that made everyone go nuts. then towards the end of the show, redman was really stoked on body-surfing. he kept climbing onto the speakers and jumping into the audience. good show.

ended the night with a tv show about the history and influence of filming animals.
. . .
woah, i just had a deja vu experience this very moment. trip. out.